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April 1, 2006
my happy ending
as i whiled away my saturday afternoon in a darkened movie theater, i came to the following conclusion. what i need in my life - what's been missing all of these years...is natalie portman. and yes, it was convenient that this conclusion came to me during a screening of v for vendetta , but i'm pretty certain that this is something that i've felt subconsciously for a very long time, i've just never said it out loud before.
and let's face it, for a long time it had to be surpressed because, during the early stages of her career when natalie was turning in finely nuanced performances in films such as the professional, heat, and her brilliant turn in beautiful girls - it would not have been appropriate to confess that you may or may not have a not so secret crush on her - even though two of the three aforementioned films centered around the much older male protagonists struggling with that very idea.
so what can obviously be deduced from this brief overview of natalie's film career, is that what she really desires is an older man. which works out quite nicely for the two of us - because i, am several years older than natalie. of course in a couple of instances those older men ended up dying violent deaths (see professional the, vendetta v for) but i think i'm in good shape there because i'm not a professional assassin, nor am i currently involved in any revolutionary activities (i gave up the uprising against all things colplay related because i realized that people prefer to listen to music composed by asshats - it just makes their lattes taste better).
another reason this whole crazy idea just might work is that i am in no way interested in the most recent star wars trilogy or natalie's involvement therein. i would much rather focus on natalie's more artistic choices such as her brief cameo in zoolander or that movie where she had the baby in the wal-mart. although that was a tough one to watch because it also featured ashely judd and honestly, who do you choose?
and of course it has to be natalie - because she's smart and fun and sassy (and umarried) and we could spend our saturdays riding our bicycles down to the shores of gitche-gume (by the shining big sea water) and sip green tea and eat combos and talk about jean paul sartre and the perilous abyss that swallowed whole the career of emilio estevez - and i don't know if this whole thing sounds impossibly ridiculous but it wouldn't be a bad way to live out the rest of my days.
| By young_christopher | 6:12 PM